These conversations took me back to my early teaching years. I don't know if it was the fact that I was new, young and/or relatively agreeable (I'm a recovering passive-agressive) but when requests came in for my time, talents and supplies, it was often under the guise of "do this cuz I said so." What I didn't realize was that I was dealing with bullies. I'll give you an example: when I first started teaching in my school district, I was told I "had" to do a project with my students simply because the other art teachers in my district were doing it. I didn't agree with the project, didn't think it was a wise use of my time or my students' art education, so I said no. Unfortunately, bullies don't like to be told no. Rumors spread that I was uncooperative and that landed me in the hot seat with my (now former) principal. From there, I was bullied by my administration to acquiesce. And I caved. What was the result? Well, for a long time, my administration and art ed colleagues thought I would do what I was "told" to do. And I did for entirely too long. Finally, one day, I decided to remove those bullies from their pedestal. I started listening to myself, the needs of my students and my time. And I started saying no.
It's not been easy. Since then, I've battled unpleasant comments, eye rolling at meetings and one very nasty email (that my current administration handled beautifully). And you know what? It doesn't bother me. When I took away the power from the bullies, it was like a weight lifted off my shoulders. I could breathe. And I could also focus on what I knew to be important to me and my students.
It's interesting how we address bullies so much with our students but not as adults. Bullies never grow up. As long as folks give them power, you'll find them trolling online, in your workplace and, shoot, at the grocery store! Kick that pedestal out from underneath them. Reflect, listen to your gut, do what you know to be right and follow that path. From there, you can't go wrong. Love y'all!
