DIY: The Zipper Blowout

"Vintage 911, please state your emergency." ..."Well, aside from the fact that my hair is beginning to get so long that it's resembling Cousin It (sorry, still stuck in that Horror Flick Phase), I believe I just blew out my zipper! Please send help (and hair clippers) right away!"

Have you ever found yourself in a dress (and guys, if you have, you are welcome here) that was a little, um, snuggish? And when in said dress, did you ever take a deep breath and hear that horrific pop! of a button or nightmarish rrriiiip! of a seam? This has happened to me in too-tight, no-room-for-stretch, Spanx-ain't-gonna-save-you-now vintage more times that I'd like to admit. I feel like The Hulk bustin' loose of my garb but without those fab pectoral muscles and that delightfully green skin.

This beauty was found at the thrift store. Half off. I know, right! So that totally justifies the old lady I pushed out of the way and the toddler I booty bumped, right?

Ah. Look at this dress, would you? I mean, it's just divine. The Thrift Store Gods were good to me on this day. However, the Waist Line Demons were not. Their temptation of Jeni's Goat Cheese and Berry Ice Cream has been too great for this weak mortal. And, thus, The Zipper Blowout.

To be fair to my ice-cream-lovin'-waistline, the zipper did look like this when I purchased the dress. I think. Regardless, it had to come out. As heavenly as this dress is, a Holy, ahem, a Whole-y zipper just won't do.

Now putting in zippers used to be my least favorite thing, right after squeezing into Spanx and busting out of vintage, but I've since found a way to do it that's relatively pain-free. So I thought I'd share it with you. The thrifted vintage dress is handmade and a wee bit of a mess so I thought I'd demo with my Horror Flick Dress. 

Step 1: Set your sewing machine to a baste stitch. That means you are going to have very long, temporary stitches. Baste stitch the fabric together 5/8" away from the seam from the top of there the zipper will be placed to the bottom. Iron seam open like shown above.

 Step #2: Once you have ironed the seam open, lay your zipper on the open seam.

Step #3: For my dress, I tucked the top of the zipper in between the fabric to hide it and make it so the zipper reached the top of the dress.

Step #4: Align the zipper on the open seam.

Step #5: And tape it down on open seam with Scotch tape.

Step #6: With tape still on the dress, turn the dress right side out. Change your sewing foot to a zipper foot (not sure which is the zipper foot? Read that neglected manual. I promise your machine came with a zipper foot. It should be shaped like the letter "I".) Change your setting from a basting stitch to a sewing stitch (which means your stitches will be shorter and more permanent). Sew 1/4" away from the basting seam.

Step #7: Don't forget to sew across the bottom of the zipper with a teeny tiny little stitch as seen on the left. Turn the garment inside out. Start the fun process of picking off the tape.

Step #8: Turn garment right side out. Using a seam ripper carefully remove basting stitches. Once complete, you have installed your zipper! I'd give you a high five, but I don't want you smacking the life outta your fancy ipad. Goodness knows my uber chic Compaq can't handle it.

And there you have it. Fixing a Zipper Blowout. Piece of cake. Which I won't be having anytime soon in this teeny (can't breathe!) tiny (I think I'm gonna pass out!) dress (you call this a dress?! I call this a Medieval Gut-Squeezing Torture Device!).

Vintage 911 Update: Thank you so much with your help on my last Vintage 911. I asked for suggestions on removing the stain from my dress and I got so much great advice (none of which I've taken but that's besides the point). Jenny of The Southern Institute and Casey over at Casey's Elegant Musings both suggested Oxiclean. I also had advice on trying Windex, Dreft and Flortex Carpet Cleaner. And, if all else fails, fellow art teacher Phyl suggested applique. A girl after my own heart.

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DIY: The 1970's Dorky Teacher Skirt

Dying for a Double DIY? Here's how to paint your own Pencil Shoes!

 This past weekend's to-do list looked like this:

1. Mow the yard...nope, didn't do it.
2. Clean the house...I danced around with the Swiffer, which counts as cleanin' in my book.
3. Go for a run...naw, no one was chasing me so, why bother?

That's all I had to do this weekend. And I didn't even manage to get 50% done. Which kinda makes me sound like a slack-tastic slug. Unless you take into consideration that I did something that wasn't even on my list: I made the World's Dorkiest Teacher Skirt. That's right. I just turned that Slack-tastic into Tacky-tastic. Because it's what I do.

Please try to ignore the dust bunnies that my Swiffer Samba didn't pick up.

It all started with this 1970's wrap skirt I picked up at Goodwill years ago. Yeah, I said years. I don't get rid of anything. In fact, when I start cleaning out, I make huge stacks of things to donate...and then refold them and place them back in my closet. Where they belong. Along with my cassette tapes, my VCR and Richard Simmons workout videos. I'd laugh with you if I wasn't crying.

How I usually go about bringing my goofy ideas to life: I start with a sketch and just dive in. I find that if I spend too much time thinking an idea through, Sane Cassie will usually come to her senses and drop it. However, if I just go at it, Crazy Cassie can sometimes make it happen. Am I really talking about myself in third person? Isn't that what Sybil used to do...?

This skirt was actually inspired by my vintage palette and rainbow wrap skirts that you can see here. I didn't make either of those but I have done my share of applique in the past (check out my Rock Star Apron). You can applique on any ole sewing machine. It's just like collage with the stitching acting as your glue.

For the pencils (because I know you are dying to get your tacky on):

1. Pin your pencil drawing to some yellow fabric (I used a mustard yellow linen) and some facing. Cut it out.

2. Cut out shapes of eraser, the pencil ferrule (what you didn't know that's what the metal thingie was called?), the wooden tip and the lead.

3. Tack shapes down with stitch witchery (non-sewers, that's this magical stuff that will adhere fabric with just the heat of an iron).

4. Set your sewing machine to the zigzag setting. Now each machine is different as far as setting go. So you may have to uproot that manual you never read and give it a peak under "applique stitching". Trust me, your machine can do this. The applique is simply a very tight zigzag stitch.

Oh, look it's The Notebook. By the way, am I the last female on the planet that hasn't seen that movie? Yeah yeah, I get it, they're wearing vintage, it's romantic and (gasp!) Ryan Gosling is in it. But I just can't handle that much sap {shivers}.

The notebook was a snap. I doubled up the white fabric and adding facing to the back. Before adding it to the skirt, I stitched on the lines for the page and the little doodled heart. Once appliqued to the skirt, I added the spiral bound rings and the lines for the sheets of paper.

Before teaching art, I thought all #2 pencils were all alike. Oh contraire mon ami. The Ticonderoga big pencils are my personal fave in the art room.

Once the notebook was attached, I appliqued on the pencils. This part took a pinch longer because I wanted to match the applique thread with the colors of the pencil. Because I'm only detail oriented when it comes to the important things. Like applique. Remembering to drop by the bank, the post office and the grocery? Um, not so much.

I know it looks like a drag, but it really was just a matter of changing the thread out. The key to a clean applique stitch is making sure that your needle zigzags from the edge of your fabric to the inside.

Does it get any dorkier? Me thinks not.

The only thing missing is a pencil hair clip. Or a pencil beret. Perhaps a pencil sombrero? Always an option.

Please tell me this isn't my fate...but if I do get an itch, it's nice to know you can still buy sweaters like this here.

Now when Crazed Cassie was in the midst of whipping up this little number, she (okay, this is weird, I'm switching to first person), ahem, I asked hubs for some advice. He's like the Tasteful to my Tacky. 

So I inquired: On the notebook, do you think I should use black thread or gray thread for the heart doodle?

Hubs: I don't think you should put a doodle on the notebook.

Moi: Well, that wasn't really the question. Black or gray was my question.

Hubs: I have an idea, how about you stitch the alphabet on it? You know, like a capital A and then a lower case a and then a B and a C?

Moi: What?! That would make it look totally tacky!

Hubs: (exasperated "I-think-you've-already-reached-that-level" look).

Really? I don't know, let's do the math:

Two pencils plus one notebook and a heart equals Pretty Stinkin' Dorky.

Add in some pencil shoes and, yep, he's right Totally Tacky.

Well, if anything, at least I'm consistent. Now! Off to make a Pencil Hat!

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DIY: The Embroidered Eiffel Dress

Bonjour, ya'll! 

As you might have guessed from my art room windows and my French poodle dress, I'm on a bit of a Parisian kick. I finished the embroidery for this dress during our last couple of road trips and, despite a wee bit of a disagreement between the hubs and myself (which I'm going to need your help settling), I'm excited with how it turned out. Especially since it began it's life looking like this...

This little hook in my sewing room usually holds half a dozen of work-in-progress, in-need-of-TLC, please-iron-yesterday dresses. I moved the mound so you could focus on this little bitty dress.

I spotted this dress at Goodwill. I recall this style from a couple years ago, you know, that elastic-waist-band-thing. Most of the tops of these dresses where usually tanks, which I never cared for. The sweet yellow blouse is what drew me to this dress. It's tragic flaw was the fact that the skirt was, like, 14" in length which is just a wee bit of a problem for this never-shave-above-the-knee-caps gal.

I began by letting out the hem and removing the pockets. I found this formerly-a-curtain vintage floral fabric in my stash and decided it would look lovely at the bottom of my dress. I had this idea that I wanted it to look like I was walking through a flower garden. Or being eaten alive by vintage fabric. Which, with my hoarder ways, the latter is more likely the case.

Before adding the vintage fabric to the skirt, I hemmed it and created a circle of fabric that was the same circumference as the bottom of the dress. Then I pinned it to the dress and appliqued stitched around  the edge of the flowers. Once that was complete, I had the super duper fun pleasure of trimming all of the excess fabric off the top. I managed to cut into the skirt accidentally only once...which I promptly patched after saying a few naughty words and throwing a couple of things.

Hubs and I have been enjoying some road trippin' during his time off. My favorite car-traveling craft is embroidery. I've worked on my Naughty Nautical Girls dress, my Pin-up Cowgirls dress and my Presley Poodle all while on the road.

Can you guess my inspiration for the dress? You know I love to go all Miss Frizzle what with my clothes matching my teaching unit. I drew out a sketch of the Eiffel Tower on paper, traced it with a Sharpie, pinned that drawing under my dress and (gasp!) drew the tower onto my dress in pencil before embroidering the Eiffel.

Aw, look at young Brigette Bardot in front of the Eiffel Tower wearing what looks to be a vintage Snuggie. This is actually the hair do I was aspiring to. With flowers, of course.

Okay, remember that disagreement between the hubs and myself? Well, I think I needed to add something to the top, to balance out the dress. My idea is to applique some of the flowers onto the left side of the blouse, as seen in the photo on the left (if you click on the photo, I think you'll get a better look). 

Hubs seems to think I need to leave it alone as seen in the photo on the right. I say it's too "business on the top, Parisian party on the bottom". He says I have a habit to taking things to another (read tacky-er) level.

So, dear reader, what do you think? I'd love to hear your input in the poll at the top of this post on the right (which took me far too long to figure out how to install!)...and a comment if you have the time. Thanks for playing!

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What the Art Teacher Wore #16

Monday, Seriously??: The last time I wore this dress one of my students asked, "Are you dressed like the Cleaning Lady today?" So this time I decided to jazz it up with a too-big flower and too-many necklaces. flower hair pin: flower from Joann's, hair pin made by me; necklaces: dunno, Target?; dress: Paul and Joe purchased for cheap a million years ago at Urban Outfitters; shoes: Blowfish picked up at TJMaxx

Hello there! Just a little peak at what I decided was appropriate to wear this week. And by "appropriate" I mean "what's clean and not on the floor of my closet". While scooting around on the internet (okay, let's just say it, there is no more "surfing the net" for us ladies, it's just pinteresting. Am I right?), I came upon these amazing works of art. And because I've been shoveling sugary sweets all week in an attempt to stay upright and perky, I thought I'd share with you some drool-worthy delectables that I have decided would complete me. Hope you enjoy!

Isn't this stunning? I love it. Frida Kalho by Alexey Kurbatov.

Flowery sugar cookies? Can I wear them in my hair and grab -n- eat when the mood strikes? Me thinks yes. Bakin' ideas found here.

Too Pink Tuesday: I am in love with this dress. Mostly because a dear friend who used to wear it gifted it to me. I think the color combination is divine. dress: gift from a friend; sweater: Ann Taylor, thrifted; flowers: H & M; shoes: Anthro couple years ago

Is that a key lime pie I spy? Mmmm, my favorite. Cakes and Pies by Wayne Thiebaud

Vintage wedding cakes, so cute! My fave is mini on the jadeite cake stand.

Wild Hair Wednesday: I swear the ends of my hair isn't really that bad. All my photos this week were taken at the end of some very long days at which point my hair was the least of my worries. sweater: thrifted: dress: vintage, thrifted; belt: made by me; shoes: BC

No where near the wonder of this woman, but I thought her color scheme kinda-sorta worked with mine. Wonder Woman by Nicole Charbonnet You should really check out her stuff, it's awesome.

Wait, what? Is this the grown-up version of candy necklaces? Why am I just now hearing about this?!

Thursday, I'd like you better if you had an FRI at the beginning of your name: Don't ask me what I am doing with my mouth in this picture. Possibly talking to myself. That's what too much sugar will do to ya. sweater: ebay; dress: vintage, thrifted; belt: Pinky Otto; necklace: vintage, thrifted; flowers: H & M; amazing owl sandals: Anthro, last year

I thought this wild -n- wacky Hollywood painting completed my look. A giant hovering In -n- Out Burger cup? With frolicking elephant underneath? Sure, why not? Found here.

The only thing that would make this better would be a wig of cotton candiness.

Friday, I've been waiting for you since Wednesday: Seriously, this week was a long one. That way for anyone else? dress: vintage, picked up for 25 pennies at the by-the-pound Goodwill; belt and flower hair clips: made by me; shoes: Frye picked up at Marti and Liz

The dress had the worlds smallest waist. Seriously, it was 10" wide. And I was determined to wear it. So I added this panel of lace in the back which not only extended the too-small waist but also the too-small bust.

The bold colors at the top of this painting reminded me of the bold flower at the top of my head. Bloom by Meredith Pardue.

Mmmm, nothing says delish like jell-o mold desserts, my favorite! (Ha, I kid, I have a fear of all things jell-o-y). Thanks for stopping by!

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What the Art Teacher Wore #15

Monday, Nobody Likes You: A coworker told me she had recently purchased these same Target sandals...and contemplated taking them back after seeing that the "crazy art teacher" also had them -- humph! cardigan, flower pins: H&M; dress: gift from a friend; belt: Pinkyotto; sandals: Target

Well, I dunno about you, but in my little part of the world, this week was like a sucker punch to the gut. My poor students and their teachers had to endure our state's standardized testing. For at least two hours every morning, my students had to take these tests that were most definitely written by trolls who live a kid-free life in their underground dungeon. By the time the kids came to art class, they were like zombies straight out of a horror movie.

Speaking of movies...I decided to take a different direction on this week's What I Wore. Instead of pairing my ensemble with a masterpiece, I decided to track down vintage movie posters that I found complimented my look. My search also lead me to a couple of goodies that would make my look complete, if only. You'll have to tell me what you think. Now go enjoy yourself a good movie and your weekend!

So while hubs and I were outside taking a photo of Monday's outfit, the neighbor's cat Rhett Butler (no, not kidding, I do live in The South) decided to join the fun. He's quite the character, loving one minute and attacking the next. So this book cover illustrates his craziness nicely. I know, I said I'd show movie posters, but this was just too perfect: From "Wiplala" written by Annie M.G. Schmidt, illustrated by Jenny Dalenoord, Holland, 1958

My feet say "no" but the crazy cat lady says "yesssss!" Pixie Lott in Mui Mui.

Tuesday: sweater: ebay; dress: The Hip Zipper, the best vintage joint in Nashville; owl sandals: Anthopologie

I love this poster...and would love to see the movie. I think I would fall under the "spoiled" category. My dear hubs lets me buy anything I want...at the thrift store. Image found here.

Can I please lounge on this in my pink gingham dress and be a bad sistah? Oh, summer vacation, you can't come soon enough! I found this lovely couch here.

Guess-who's-excited-she-finished-her-embroidery Wednesday: This is the dress that I embroidered and shared a DIY over at this lovely blog. dress: The Gap; shoes: Borne...these are the worst shoes ever, don't buy them. They absolutely will not stay on your feet, ugh!

Oh, Doris Day, you so stinkin' cute! Send Me No Flowers, found here.

I have needed a floral fix almost daily. Is it spring or a new trend? Don't care, just gimme some more flowers! Tights found here.

Thursday, You're such a Wild Cat: dress and sweater: thrifted; belt and sandals: made by me. The sandal base is from Sseko; headband: Peachy Tuesday

Boxers, briefs or...jungle panties? Image found here.

Can you believe the awesomeness that is my headband? No extra accessories needed, this is just perfect. Thank you, Jen at Peachy Tuesday!

Friiiidaaaaaay!: sweater: thrifted; dress: super cute vintage shop in Knoxville called Four Seasons Vintage; sandals: Frye; hairclip: made by me

Honestly, I struggled to find a poster for this outfit. It's a stretch but I'm thinking the stripes and the kinda-sorta similar palette makes it work...right? Found here.

Wanna know what I just did? I just got the Pink Panther theme song stuck in your head. You're welcome!

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