DIY: Christmas Tablecloth to Lady Skirt

Have you ever found yourself, late at night (and by "late" I mean 10:17pm because it's a school night and that qualifies as, like, super late) behind the wheel of a sewing machine attaching the garland you stripped from your Christmas tree to an already tacky skirt and thought to yourself, "Who am I and why am I creating what's sure to be the tackiest ensemble to date?" 

I dare say, I find myself in these types of situations, asking myself these very questions, more often than I'd like to admit. 

Although, honestly,  at the time of the creation of this skirt, I actually thought it was pretty stinking cute. Granted, that was one biggie-sized glass of grape-flavored grown-up drink into my evening so my judgement mightah been a pinch screwed, er, skewed. It wasn't until the following day when I decided my Candy Cane Cons were the perfect addition my ensemble that I was met with some criticism. In the form of a second grader. Which sounded a lil bit like this:

Second Grade Girl: Mrs. Stephens, [smiling sweetly] I really like your skirt and I really like those shoes but I don't know if I really like them together. I don't wanna hurt your feelings but I bet you would look cuter in your heels.

I took that kind commentary much better than the hubs who gave me one up/down look and said, "That is not one of my favorite outfits of yours." Or the co-worker who exclaimed, "Ohhh, that is baaaaad, Cassie." 

Yeah, well, you win some...

And, honestly, since you don't give a rat's pah-tootie what anyone else thinks, you win some more. Whilst looking like Christmas up-chucked on you. Cuz it's what you do.

Wait, whuuut? You too wanna look like some sort of Christmas-obsessed tackless maniac? Well, sister-friend, get in line. And allow me to show you how it's done. 

Start by hitting the thrift stores, ebay and etsy-town to find just the tacky Christmas tree skirt or tablecloth you might need. This shouldn't be hard. Since most people in the universe have good taste, they have a habit of avoiding the ugly. Because I'm a firm believe in Leave No Christmas Crap Behind, I always find a plethora of glittery-gaudy-goodness. Once you've gotten your kitten mittens on a tree skirt/tablecloth, find yourself a circle skirt pattern. I scored mine on etsy a while back. I simply use the waist and waistband pattern for my alterations. You can read more details about that super simple process in last year's post Tree Skirt to Lady Skirt in 60 Minutes or Less. 

And what's a tacky Christmas skirt without some garland gaudiness, hmmm? Not even worth the effort, says me. Garland Stitching Hazard: Your sewing room floor WILL look like you slaughtered Tinker Bell as it will be covered in glittery pixie-dust-esque goodness. Since this isn't my first trip down garland stitching lane, I've learned a thang or two: set your machine on the zigzag stitch (so it catches more of the garland) and avoid pinning as you'll never EVER be able to find those dang sparkly pins in that dang sparkly garland. Which could ultimately result in you sitting down in said skirt and sitting down on said pins. In your garland-y gluteus maximus. You can take a visit to the World's Tackiest Sweater that I garland-ized here, if you think your eyes can handle the glory. 

Dang, you want more tacky skirt sassiness? Well, here's a look-see at last years attempt...

And yet another. Cuz if it's one thing I am, it's consistently tacky. 

And, would you find this incredibly hard to believe...I have yet another tacky Christmas tree skirt to lady skirt in the works. Oh and friends, just you wait. You ain't seen nuthin' yet.

So, I gotta ask, what tackiness are you sporting this holiday season? 

AND is this really as bad as co-worker, kid and hubs say? (if the answer is "no" feel free to not comment).