DIY: Mirror, Mirror

Hush. Don't even say it. I know what you're thinking:

"This Cassie-person things she's classy and fabulous? Wait, didn't I just read in her last entirely-too-long-post that she dropped a food processing blade on her foot that she bandaged up with a, what totally classy thing was it again, oh yeah, a tampon?! AND isn't she the one who makes fun of New Zealanders and their pronunciation of "decks"? I bet she punches puppies and eats food off the floor (um, no! I love puppies! And, well, yes, sometimes. Gotta get to it before the puppies do. Even if I don't have puppies.) Classy my a--" (hey! This is a family friendly blog, try to keep it clean, would ya!? Geez.)

Dude, I couldn't agree more. In fact, dear ole hubs occasionally refers to me as "Classy Cassie" because he likes to be ironic (at least I think I'm using that word correctly. Alanis Morissette has confused me for life. Canadians, I swear. Oh, crap, did I just offend another country?! Sorry, dudes). In fact, I hesitated to even share this DIY with you in light of all my recent moronicness. Seriously. And, if you can believe this, I've even managed to step it up a classless notch since last chatting with you which was, oh, 36 hours ago. Because if it's one thing I've got down, it's the classless bit. It's called perfectionist, people. You outta try bein' it.

What you see here is one classy babe. I mean, who just wakes up one morning and decides, "Yeah, Ima gonna wear my necklaces backwards," and bam! does it with a look that says, "What?! You not fabulous enough to pull this off?!" Why Coco Chanel, that's who.

 Oh, not believin' me? You're only saying that because you want more examples of what an idiot I am. Well, I always come prepared, so here you go:

So our house is full of critters and creepy crawlies inside and out. Why just the other night I found Asha the Cat running, leaping and body-slamming the front door in what I thought was a feeble attempt to escape the Haus of Food Processing Blades. Turns out she'd spotted this wee one and was just dying to get her kitten mittens on him. Probably so she could turn him into a chew toy and leave him under my side of the bed as she's done in the past. Which is yet another reason not to clean: discovering you've been sleeping just mere inches away from a fresh kill. Sometimes it's best not to know.

 

Don't you even say, "awww." This is the same cat that demands to be fed each morning at 5:15am, including weekends. So determined was she to get me outta bed that she once stuck her claw inside my nose and when I pulled away it raked the inside of my nostril which bled for the rest of the day. When I told hubs, he said, "well, you should have gotten up to feed her." Humph.

Anyway, frogs are just the tip of the creepy crawly iceberg at Casa de Cassie. My least favorite are spiders, right after silverfish (which hubs SWEARS do not exist and that I'm making them up. What?! Back me up here, they're the ones that when you step on 'em the other half crawls away. More than likely, up your leg, disappearing inside your shorts causing you to do your best dance moves ever).

And it's because these things make me super jumpy that the following happened: while changing the bandage on my foot, I saw the stitches out of the corner of my eye, mistook them for a spider and smacked my foot. 

That's right. 

Classy? Why, yes.

Fabulous? Would you really expect any less from me?

So when my mother-in-law gifted me this estate sale find, I just knew it'd be the perfect surface for Coco's quote. But first I had to remove that warped and fugly paper design. Which I did by stabbing and slicing it repeatedly with an Exacto-knife. It's really surprising that I've not injured myself before. Because I actually come from a long line of limb-losers (okay, just my mom. And, alright, she's just big-toe-less due to some freakish toe-in-bicycle-spoke accident. My fave part of that story is that her brother had to hold the detached toe all the way to the hospital. This also ended her foot modeling career.)

  

After tracing the paper circle onto a piece of paper, I wrote out the quote in sharpie and traced it onto some sort of linen-y fabric in pencil. Which is totally not how you are supposed to go about doing embroidery. Something about pinning it to your fabric, sewing through the paper design and later removing the paper with tweezers. What?! No. That sounds like time better spent doing other things. Like eating food off the floor.

When I was all finished embroidering (which, by the way, have you seen the embroidery on this dress?! Now I look more chump-y than normal. Thanks, Lauren), I busted out my fave glue. Have you ever used this stuff? I like to imagine the creator, Aleene, being some big bouffant'ed and bejeweled Southerner who was all like, "Elmer's glue?! Pshaw, honey, I need something much tackier than that if Ima gonna glue all these here shells to this here lamp. I'll just make my own glue with some Crisco and boiled down opossum." See? And you thought I was only pickin' on the Kiwis and the Canadians. Oh, naw. I'm an equal opportunity picker-on'er.

After slathering my Aleene's Tacky Glue all over the backside of the mirror, I placed the embroidery on top and used the aforementioned Exacto to shove the stray bits of fabric under the lip of the mirror.

After hanging the mirror on my sewing room wall, I felt it needed a little something more. So I added the little candy cane stripped ribbon and called it finished.

Coco Chanel sprinkling her fabulous classiness on one of her signature dresses.

And there you have it. A little embroidered reminder for me to strive toward the classy and fabulous. Which I totally forgot to do during my Multiple Doctors Appointment Day. In an attempt to be efficient, I scheduled both an eye and, ahem, a lady-parts doctor appointment in one day. This being the day after the Food Processing Blade Incident. So, imagine if you will, an eyes dilated, limpy and bandaged foot goofball stumbling into, for lack of a better term, the legs-in-stirrups room. The alarmed look on the nurse's face caused me to blurt out:

"I swear to you I'm not all jacked up on bath salts!"

"Uh, okay. What happened to you?"

"Oh, I just, you know, dropped a food processing blade on my foot that, you'll appreciate this, I bandaged with a tampon. I had to get a couple of stitches. And I was just at the eye doctor so my pupils are all coke-head huge."

"Uh, okay. I'm going to get the doctor now."

Aw, don't act like Coco Chanel wouldn't have done the very same thing. Chat at ya soon, ya'll!

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DIY: Floral Embroidery

So, do you remember that floral embroidery sneak-peak I shared with you here? Well, I finally finished it! But if you want to read more, you'll have to head over to one of my favorite blogs, The Little Red Squirrel.

Sweet Katie, the creative mind behind The Little Red Squirrel, is on vacation in Paris (I had to photoshop my green-with-envy face) and asked me if I wouldn't mind being a guest blogger for her. I shared with her readers my floral embroidery DIY. I do hope you'll take a look and add her blog to your blog reader, it's fantastic!

And thanks again, Katie, it was a delight. Enjoy your holiday!

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Weekend Adventure: Back and Forth

I love this turtle mosaic by the Tennessee artist Sherri Warner Hunter. This guy was featured with several large mosaic fish and a lizard bench at a rest stop on the way to Chattanooga.

This weekend, hubs and I took a road trip to Chattanooga, Tennessee. Now, if ya'll aren't from around these parts, Chattanooga is a sweet town most famous for it's Lookout Mountain. To access the mountain, you can take what's called the Incline Railway which is a sort of train car that halls you at a near 75 degree angle to the top. It is not for the faint of heart.

It's about a two hour drive to Chat from Nashville. On my lap was my latest embroidery project. I'm working from a vintage dictionary with the best illustrations. I can't wait to share with you the finished product...but it might be a while.

Having done the Incline before, we passed on it. Besides we had other things on our agenda. Me, I was all about the vintage, antique and thrift shops. Hubs? Well, if you must know, it was the donut shop. Seriously. We drove two hours for donuts.

Not just any donuts, mind you, Julie Darling Donuts. They were pretty fab. We sampled the red velvet, blueberry and the glazed. None of them were your traditional donut: the glazed was amazing with a bread like texture; the blueberry was crispy on the outside like it had been deep fried and the red velvet had an incredible cream cheese frosting. They also had a bacon donut and an Oreo covered number that looked pretty interesting.

Chattanooga is a pretty arsty town with sculptures and paintings along their river front. I took piano lessons for years, but those of you that know me, know the real piano story. Those of you that don't know this infamous tale, let's just say it involves an Amish piano-tuning dude, my mother and something you'd never thought you'd find inside a piano.

After devouring our donuts, we walked along the riverfront venturing into shops. I managed to do a little damage at one antique store before we hit Lupi's Pizza.

One of my finds: I picked up this sweet little bird tray at The Knitting Mill Antiques. I loved it's unique diamond shape. Perfect for holding my wool snippets and my hook. The little snippets can be felted and made into things like this sweet pin cushion.

Our intent was to stay over in Chat...but to be honest, we felt like we'd done what we came to do: eat deliciously naughty food and buy other people's junk. To Do, Ta Done.

Getting home early allowed me to finish another square in my rug hooking! The flower took a lot longer than the geometric design but I'm really excited with the result.

The variegated yellow wool and the maroon wool that are outlining the flower are both from recycled clothing. I cannot wait to start on my next square. But I have entirely too many other things on my Shoulda-Gotten-Done-Five-Days-Ago list to even think about that.

Okay, the real reason we drove all the way to Chattanooga and back again? This sweet face.

Not only that, but someone has staked her claim in my wool storage! And, lemme tell you, if you even attempt to pull out a strand of wool on her watch, she'll shred you to bits with those claws. So, until she moves on, looks like I'll working on that embroidery!

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DIY: Turn Him Loose, Jill!

Oh, you know. Just another day of wranglin' those wild and wacky children in the art room.

Well, howdy thar, partner! It's yer Cowgirl of Suburbia here to show off my latest embroidered ensemble. I finished 'er off with a lick and a promise. Wanna hear how? Well then saddle up, 'cuz yer in for a hog-killin time. This weekend, I decided to quit beatin' the devil around the stump and finally finish the dang thang. Now lemme stop shootin' my mouth off and tell ya how I did it.

(So you too can annoy your friends by speaking in cowboy slang, visit here: http://freepages.genealogy.rootsweb.ancestry.com/~poindexterfamily/OldWestSlang.html )

Turn Him Loose, Bill by Frederic Remington, late 1800s

This latest embroidered venture began with a rather ho-hum dress I picked up a Target several years ago. It had been sitting in my Give-to-Goodwill-or-Restyle pile for quite some time. After my embroidered pin-up girl sailor dress (seen here: http://cassiestephens.blogspot.com/2012/01/apparently-ive-much-to-learn-about.html ), I was inspired to create another stitched look. With it's raw-hide tan color and collared style, I thought this dress could easily be cowboy-ized.

My Sweethearts of the Rodeo.

With that in mind, I began pinteresting and googling  "pin-up cowgirls". Which produced nothing. So I tried "vintage cowgirls". Nada. Then "cowboy rodeo"...and this amazing painting by Frederic Remington popped up. I loved it and I knew I wanted that same image across the bottom of the skirt. But with cowgirls.

So I began sketching out the scene replacing the gents with the ladies. Once I'd settled on a design I was happy with, I traced my drawing with sharpie. Using my light table, I redrew my design in pencil onto the dress. A big embroidery no-no. I think you are supposed to pin a tissue paper drawing to the fabric, embroider through that and then, once finished, remove tissue paper with tweezers. All that sounds entirely too pro for this cowgirl.

My spin on Remington's painting which I've titled Turn Him Loose, Jill.

I usually only embroider when I'm traveling. I like to have something to do while sitting for long periods of time. But this weekend, I experienced a craft fail (more on that in a later post) and needed something to keep me from finding solace in a tub of Blue Bell. So I pulled out my cowgirls and decided to finish them off.

One thing I did differently with these girls is I used one strand of embroidery thread to create the eyebrows and eyes. This gave me the ability to really capture their expression. I also added a tiny stitch of white for the reflection in their eyes. I think this girl's my fave.

During my embroidery breaks, I decided to do a little research on the cowgirl. These women were so strong physically and mentally. After reading about several of them, I choose my favorite three and christened my cowgirls in their honor. Without further ado, lemme introduce to you Lucille Mulhall. This cowgirl was once described in a 1900 New York article as "only 90 pounds, can break a bronc, lasso and brand a steer, and shoot a coyote at 500 yards. She can also play Chopin, quote Browning and make mayonnaise." Wow. I didn't even know  you could make mayo.

Okay, this gal has a bit of a nose on her, doncha think? She's my Barbara Steisand Cowgirl.

Cowgirl Bertha Kaelpernick (aka "Jill") was most famous for entering a horse race after all the menfolk refused due to the muddy track. This amazing cowgirl managed to remain in her saddle despite the conditions and put the men to shame. Later she went on to compete and often beat legendary cowboys of her time.

I've decided I need three items added to my wardrobe: spurs, a pair of cowboy boots (these Frye one's I snagged off ebay are too big), a vintage cowgirl dress. With fringe, of course.

Following in Bertha’s footsteps was Prairie Rose Henderson. She had to force cowboys to allow her to ride and compete with them. She's actually my favorite cowgirl as she's most famous for her affinity for all things tacky-tastic. Her faves were dressing in bright colors, sequins, and ostrich plumes over her bloomers.

Best compliment of the day: "You look like a Cowgirl Art Teacher!" Sounds good to me!

Can you believe these incredible cowgirls?

Well, little doggies, I'm about played out. Guess it's time for me to skedaddle or I'll be paying through the nose tomorrow! See ya's at the ranch.

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DIY: Pirate Style

Apparently, I've much to learn about fashion. Today, I was told, "Mrs. Stephens, I like your pirate dress." Er, my what? "You're a pirate! Cuz that big black collar thingie makes you look like a one." Sweet.

Hiya and thank you for visiting my blog! I'm interrupting this post to say that I recently finished another embroidered dress which you can read about here: http://cassiestephens.blogspot.com/2012/02/turn-him-loose-jill.html

I thrifted this '70's era black sailor dress at the end of the summer. I'd been looking for a little sailor get-up and this seemed to do the trick...except for one tragic flaw. It was booorrrriiiing. If I'm going to wear something, it better be glittery, bedazzled, patternedy (a fashion term, look it up) and just overall over-the-top tacky. And I kinda fell asleep just looking at this number.

When I told a kindergartener today, "You look nice with your shirt tucked in," I was informed, "It's not called 'tucked in', it's called 'rodeo style'." Yeehaw.

I knew I wanted to alter it somehow but nothing was coming to me. Ideas never do when I sit down and focus on them. They usually come to me when I'm falling asleep or doing something extremely mundane, like attending a faculty meeting (haha! I kid!). So I had this dress hanging in my sewing room for ages just waiting for the idea to come.

Not too long ago, I woke up early, washed and straightened my hair and went to school bumpit-less. When my first class arrived, one of my fashion-savvy first graders said, "Where is the beautiful Mrs. Stephens? Your hair is so flat." Humph.

 This idea actually came from this lovely blog: http://misskatie-littleredsquirrel.blogspot.com/'' A couple of months ago she showcased a beautiful skirt that she had embroidered pin-up girls all over. I decided to do the same. Seeing as how my dress has a sailor style, I thought my little pin-ups would WW II era sailor girls.

The next day, when I had this same student in my class, I was OF COURSE wearing my biggest baddest bumpit. She was so thrilled that she decided to pat me on the head and say, "Good, Mrs. Stephens!" Little did she know that those bumpits have teeth and when she patted my head, they poked and startled her causing her to shriek and pull back her hand. Revenge is so sweet.

 I scoured pinterest for pin-ups and started sketching out and altering my girls. There weren't too many sailors girls to be found, so for some of these, I added sailor-esque details like the anchor and the steering wheel. I know it's not called that but I'm too lazy to find the correct term. Stern? That sounds right.

After a very in-depth demonstration on rainbow printing today, I asked my fourth graders if they had any questions. One student raised her hand and asked, "I just have to know, how many pairs of tights are you wearing right now?" Oh boy.

My favorite thing about working on this dress, aside from being done with it, was the people I met while working on it. I only work on embroidery while traveling. It gives me something to do in the car or on the plane. On a recent trip out to California, I took my embroidery and met two truly delightful women. Both were so excited when I took my work out. They had both embroidered in the past, one even worked as an embroidery designer in New York, and both lived during World War II. It was such a delight hearing their stories and receiving letters from them upon my return home. Chatting with them has me working on my next project. And, no, it's not a pirate's outfit!

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