DIY: An Optical Illusion of Embroidery

Dontcha think it's pretty safe to say that the interests you had as a kid kinda-sorta shape your interests as an adult? Now, granted, not all the things you were fascinated with translate into adulthood (my super mad collection of Hot Wheels cars never resulted in my becoming a mechanic even if the grimy paint/clay combo under my nails kinda makes me look that way) but you gotta admit, some things leave their mark. For example, if you know me even a lil bit, would it surprise you that I loved my Fashion Plates growing up?

Gah, anyone else out there have these? My fave thing to do was to put together the most ridiculous outfits possible. Not at all like what I do on a daily basis. Not. At. All. 

There were some toys that I wanted with every ounce of my lil kid fiber which my parental units just flat out refused me. Take this Make Me Pretty Barbie, for instance. Just because I had this habit of hacking the hair off my dolls didn't mean I'd do the same to ole Babs. If Ida had this bad boy growin' up, I wonder how that woulda translated to adulthood. Would I have frosted my tips? Become tanorexic? The funny thing is, as I'm typing this post, I'm currently wearing a hot pink necklace, a side pony and a bow. So I guess some things stick with ya no matter whut. 

 What toy creator thought, "hey! Let's create a decapitated life-size Babs to make lil girls feel totes inadequate about their looks!" Sadly most of my buddy's Make Me Pretty Barbies ended up with Sharpie'ed faces and half burnt scalps. Which, with her edgy and punk-ish looks, always made her the Angsty Artsy Babs in my book. 

Naw, my parents couldn't be bothered with fun stuff like Decap Babs. Instead I was given educational and crafty stuff like my beloved calligraphy set and a never-ending latch hook kit. If you grew up in the 1980s, I wanna know what toys you had, yo. Take the wee quiz on the right and click on the toys you grew up with. Do you think stuff had anything to do with who you are now?

I spent weeks latch hookin' the crap outta that mushroom on my babysitters couch. I never did finish the thing...but I have always loved creating with fibers. So there's that.

Oh, my bad. They DID get me a Barbie (or twenty) along with an office chair (whuh?) and a 500 piece puzzle. To this very day I freaking hate puzzles. Why would anyone wanna put together 500 pieces of anything let alone a crappy 1980s landscape. These are the questions that haunt my sleepless nights. 

Often times, when I'm dreaming up lesson plans for the kids, I think to myself, "what did I love to do as a kid?" It's then that I think back to my Fashion Plates and my latch hookin' ways and retro fun-ness comes to mind. Like working with my spirograph for instance.

I'd totes forgotten about Spirograph until I discovered one in my art room a couple years back. Granted, it's missing some key pieces but I still had fun toying around with it. Over the summer, I found this very vintage version of a Spirograph called a Magic Designer. Did y'all have either of those growin' up?

When I first found that Spirograph in my room years ago, I spent a couple hours playing with the designs. I love the look of 'em -- they are so 1950s space-age-y. It was then that I decided to make several photos copies of them, trace them onto a piece of fabric and embroider a design. Hence the pillow. 

If only I'd had a Magic Designer in my life. Have y'all ever seen this bad boy? Check out what it can do.

Yeah. Magic. I don't think I'll be stitching up that anytime soon but I do love the look of the designs, don't you?

I really want like a half dozen of these in my art room for the kids to tinker around with. That's not too much ask, right? What I really like about the Magic Designer is that it's like a little self operating machine. You seriously just adjust the settings, insert your drawing tool and turn the crank. It's fascinating to watch. 

The only problemo? That little holder for your drawing tool is so narrow that I can't seem to get anything to fit. I tried to place the inside of an ink pen into the holder but it didn't work. The lovely artwork I showed above was left behind in the box from the previous owner. So now I'm in search of a wee pen. Along with the meaning of life. Wish me luck. 

But back to teaching. So you know I scored all those lovely embroidery hoops for my fourth grade kids. Now my brain is just in "embroidery project"mode. I dunno about having the kids stitch up this kind of optical illusion-ness as it took me forever but I do like the thought. So I'm working on it. Any and all advice/comments/here's-what-you-should-do's would be greatly appreciated. Purty puhlease and tank ew.

When I stitched this up a couple years ago, I really wanted to play around with a variety of stitches. My grandma taught me how to embroider one summer as a kid (see, back to my what-you-do-as-a-child theory). At the time, I really only learned the running stitch. It was fun creating this pillow because it forced me to learn add new stitches to my life.

For more of my embroidered madness you can visit this fall top, this floral dress, that stitching of Amsterdam that I've yet to do anything with (sigh), this embroidered necklace, some stitching by my students, and some stenciled embroidery. 

So, whuh about y'all? Where there interests/toys/things-you-learned-and-loved as a kid that hang with you to this day? Still going to therapy because you're freaked out at My Buddy going "anywhere I go, he goooooes" (gah, stalker much?) or at Jem and the Holograms [my bad, spelled her name wrong in my poll!] being so "truly truly truly outrageous" that you'll never measure up (really? I wanna know what crap songwriter came up with those lyrics, y'all!). Take the lil quiz and fill me in! Oh and if I've forgotten any of your fave 1980s toys, please do fill me in. 

Until then, hope your week is Truly Truly Truly Outrageous! 

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DIY: A Quilted and Embroidered Amsterdam

Tell me if this has ever happened to you:

You're perusing your fave teaching, sewing, art-making blogs and you start to feel a little, I dunno, crappy. Because, well, look at all the amazing stuff those bloggers taught/stitched/created! How did they get all that taught, when I'm still reminding kids not to double stack artwork on the drying rack?! When did they have time to stitch that skirt when I'm still suckin' at putting in a decent zipper?! Wait, someone above the age of 10 made art?! I don't even have a single idea in my head to create from!

If this has ever happened to you, then you and I are in the very same boat, friend. And that boat has a name. I like to call it (not The Love Boat, you goober) The Big Blog Illusion. Which I realize is a crappy name for a boat but bear with me.

 Have you heard of The Big Blog Illusion? I didn't think so because I just now made it up. Lemme tell you why I coined this phrase. As blog reader, I often feel overwhelmed and totes slack-tastic when I read my fave blogs. Sometimes it's inspiring and I'll actually get up off the couch and attack that DIY...but sometimes, it's disheartening. 

However, as a blogger, let me fill you in on a wee secret: The Big Blog Illusion is just that, an illusion. Most of the time, the DIYs you see on this blog were made over the course of weeks if not months. That's the trick. Nothing that I ever share with ya'll was made overnight or over a fortnight (do you even know how long I've wanted to use that word on this blog?!). I'm a starter/work on-and-off for a while/put it to the side/pick it back up again/finally finish it weeks later kinda gal. So when I finally get around to sharing my project, it looks like this Big Fat Hairy Thang that I magically completed in a blink. Not so. Take this Quilted and Embroidered Amsterdam DIY for 'zample.

Hubs and I ventured to Amsterdam two summers ago. You'd know this if you could see my hubs now, his beard is down to his chest and his hair is to his shoulders, hence the nickname Ginger Jesus. When we returned I started looking through photos from our vacay and really loved this cityscape...

But really, what's not to love?

So when I saw this illustration in The Usborne Book of Art Ideas, I was all, hey! That's Amsterdam! Ooooh, I wanna make that right now!

And, here we are, Two. Years. Later.

(Ya'll need to get your Kitten Mittens on these Usborne Books for your art room, they're amazingness, no lie.)

But, since this is a DIY post, Ima gonna digress for uno momento. Just in case you wanna make your very own Two Year Long Quilted and Embroidered Amsterdam (which won't take you two years unless you are totes slacktastic like me). 

From my stash, I picked out gingham, striped and solid fabrics that I thought looked nice together. After cutting these into 2" X 3" shapes, I stitched them together vertically to create buildings and then stitched those buildings together to complete the cityscape. This was then stitched to some yellow background fabric and I began to embroider the buildings. Not being one of my fave things in the world, I only worked on the embroidery when traveling as it's my only craft that travels well. Which is one of the reasons it too me so stinking long.

 Now, lemme address that feeling of never having any ideas. I am not a pull-anything-outta-the-air-and-make-it-amazing kind of person. Are you? If so, I envy you and secretly hate your face. I struggle coming up with an original idea. Knowing this, my ideas usually grow out of whatever I'm currently working on. Like these planters, ya'll. I made them at a workshop (DIY here) right after I had started my embroidered Amsterdam. 

(Have ya'll ever tried satin glazes? I use Stroke and Coat by Mayco with the kids...but for me I love using these pastel color that have a lot less shine.)

So, where am I going with all this jibber-jabber? I guess what I'm trying to say is this: if you ever start to feel down like you never ever get anything accomplished after perusing those blog faves of yours,  just think of me. And my Two Year Long Embroidered Amsterdam Adventure and think, "Shoot! Ida at least had that embroidery done in a fortnight, ya'll!"

Chat with ya soonish!

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DIY Car Crafts: An Embroidered Necklace

Many moons ago, a buddy gave me a big ole bag of junk jewelry. Most of it I crafted into Bedazzled Bobbie Pins but this oval pin/necklace blank was left untouched. When I found it while riffling through, what's known in this house as, the Hoarder Room, I decided to use it for my latest car craft.

Hubs and I are just back from a recent trip to Birmingham (that'd be Alabama, not England, fyi) where we spent time with the fam. It's a good three hour road trip, so I decided to take along an embroidery craft to pass the time. Stitching a little floral motif for this brooch blank seemed like the perfect car-aftivity (that'd be car-and-craft, Bradgelina'ized).

The benefits of having a Hoarder Room: I also had the perfect necklace for my pendant. My moms-in-law gave it to me a while back and it's a perfect fit.

But before I get into all that, I gotta tell you about a lil incident that happened during our visit. My moms-in-law was complaining of an ear ache and I was just convinced that there was a monstrous mountain of ear wax in her ear. Bee-cuz that's totally what was housed in my canals recently. Not wanting to freak her out, I gave her the low-cal version of the story. But for you, I'm presenting the Chock-Full-of-Calories, High-Fructose, Carb-Overload version. You can thank me later, gator.

What my lap looks like on our car rides. I know, the scissors, ack! Not wanting to see me impaled, hubs requests that I keep 'em in the cute lil craft cubbie that's built into the door of the passenger side.

So, I had this problem where I couldn't hear for the life of me and I had a sinking suspicion that there were alien-baby-sized balls of ear wax lodged in my ear canal. Sure enough when the doc stuck his little magnifying-glass/miniature-flash-light thingie in my ear, and I gave a meek little, "do you see anything...?", he sucked in his breath and shouted, "NURSES! Get in here, you've gotta see the size of this thing!" After each and every nurse, intern, secretary and lawn mowin' dude (who they convinced to come inside after beating on the window and making wild alien-baby-ear-wax gestures) had witnessed the freak show, I hear the doc say, "NURSES! Bring in that new instrument." Which, by the way, are words you never wanna hear.

Instead of 'splainin' my stitches to you, I thought I'd just share with you the directions from the vintage embroidery book I used.

Okay, ya'll, get ready. Because the instrument those nurses brought in was a sight to behold. Imagine, if you will, a long, slightly phallic, clear shaped instrument with lights illuminating the length of it. Now imagine the thought of said instrument penetrating, for lack of a better term, your EAR. The first words outta my mouth? 

"Is that some sort of Alien Anal Probe?!" 

Which was met with no response. 

Thinking that, perhaps, they were the ones with the wax buildup and therefore couldn't hear me, I repeated myself:

"I said, IS THAT AN ALIEN ANAL PROBE?! Please, for the love of all things, lubricate that thing!"

The last thing I remember was the doc saying, "NURSES! Hold her head!" while my poor ear canal was taken advantage off. I do remember screaming, "Ouch, you've hit brain!" a coupla times before ole doc extracted the largest wad of wax known to man. After the nurses swaddled the thing and I named it George Michael, I repeated my alien-anal-probe inquiry one more time which was met with a "please pay the secretary as you exit." 

Needless to say, I didn't tell my mom's-in-law that. She got the Disney version which ended with me being able to hear so well that I heard birds chirping in the Amazon and monkeys making monkey love in Africa. Well, okay, I didn't exactly tell her that either.

Don't have a Hoarder Room full of pendant blanks? No worries, I did a lil homework for you and found blanks a plenty on etsy. Check out this wee shop.

After a trip to the 'bama doctor, looks like my mom's-in-law was actually suffering from a lil cold not a case of ear wax'itis. Some folk get off easy, I guess. No lil ear wax George Michael baby for her.

But, really, gnarly stories of ear wax is probably not why you dropped by this here blog today...or was it? Regardless, let's get back to the DIY at hand, shall we? Once I was finished with this little piece, I cut a small piece of cardboard to size and glued the embroidery to it. That was then glued inside the pendant. Wow, did I just explain this DIY in 150 words or less? And to think you had to suffer through all that other nonsense. Sucks to be you.

Hey, you embroiderers in the house, how do you store your floss? Until yesterday, I kept mine stuffed in a jar. Which meant I had to dump out the contents each time I looked for another color. Which the cat took as an invitation to start devouring strands of floss. Which is totally bad for kitty and makes for some seriously slimy floss. Ewww. Wait, where was I going with this? Oh yes, storage. When I came across this old spice rack at the thrift store, I thought it'd solve my problems. Well, one of 'em anyway. I painted the top of the rack black before hanging it (it was a little gnarly looking) and it's found a home on my sewing room wall.

Which looks a little like this. I've recently decluttered the crap outta this room (which you'd never know with one glance at the reflection in that mirror!) and thought I'd perhaps give you a little tour in the future...assuming you'd be interested. Well, would ya? I'll show you where I keep my jar of ear wax! If you ask nicely.

Wow. I just called this a DIY post and hardly spoke of said DIY. Eh, you get the idea. You don't really come here for the education. I'm not sure why you come here (and I'm guessing you aren't either) but I do appreciate you stopping by! Now, go get those ears checked! And, if you're so inclined, you can check out more of my embroidery madness here, here, here, here, and here.

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DIY: Mirror, Mirror

Hush. Don't even say it. I know what you're thinking:

"This Cassie-person things she's classy and fabulous? Wait, didn't I just read in her last entirely-too-long-post that she dropped a food processing blade on her foot that she bandaged up with a, what totally classy thing was it again, oh yeah, a tampon?! AND isn't she the one who makes fun of New Zealanders and their pronunciation of "decks"? I bet she punches puppies and eats food off the floor (um, no! I love puppies! And, well, yes, sometimes. Gotta get to it before the puppies do. Even if I don't have puppies.) Classy my a--" (hey! This is a family friendly blog, try to keep it clean, would ya!? Geez.)

Dude, I couldn't agree more. In fact, dear ole hubs occasionally refers to me as "Classy Cassie" because he likes to be ironic (at least I think I'm using that word correctly. Alanis Morissette has confused me for life. Canadians, I swear. Oh, crap, did I just offend another country?! Sorry, dudes). In fact, I hesitated to even share this DIY with you in light of all my recent moronicness. Seriously. And, if you can believe this, I've even managed to step it up a classless notch since last chatting with you which was, oh, 36 hours ago. Because if it's one thing I've got down, it's the classless bit. It's called perfectionist, people. You outta try bein' it.

What you see here is one classy babe. I mean, who just wakes up one morning and decides, "Yeah, Ima gonna wear my necklaces backwards," and bam! does it with a look that says, "What?! You not fabulous enough to pull this off?!" Why Coco Chanel, that's who.

 Oh, not believin' me? You're only saying that because you want more examples of what an idiot I am. Well, I always come prepared, so here you go:

So our house is full of critters and creepy crawlies inside and out. Why just the other night I found Asha the Cat running, leaping and body-slamming the front door in what I thought was a feeble attempt to escape the Haus of Food Processing Blades. Turns out she'd spotted this wee one and was just dying to get her kitten mittens on him. Probably so she could turn him into a chew toy and leave him under my side of the bed as she's done in the past. Which is yet another reason not to clean: discovering you've been sleeping just mere inches away from a fresh kill. Sometimes it's best not to know.

 

Don't you even say, "awww." This is the same cat that demands to be fed each morning at 5:15am, including weekends. So determined was she to get me outta bed that she once stuck her claw inside my nose and when I pulled away it raked the inside of my nostril which bled for the rest of the day. When I told hubs, he said, "well, you should have gotten up to feed her." Humph.

Anyway, frogs are just the tip of the creepy crawly iceberg at Casa de Cassie. My least favorite are spiders, right after silverfish (which hubs SWEARS do not exist and that I'm making them up. What?! Back me up here, they're the ones that when you step on 'em the other half crawls away. More than likely, up your leg, disappearing inside your shorts causing you to do your best dance moves ever).

And it's because these things make me super jumpy that the following happened: while changing the bandage on my foot, I saw the stitches out of the corner of my eye, mistook them for a spider and smacked my foot. 

That's right. 

Classy? Why, yes.

Fabulous? Would you really expect any less from me?

So when my mother-in-law gifted me this estate sale find, I just knew it'd be the perfect surface for Coco's quote. But first I had to remove that warped and fugly paper design. Which I did by stabbing and slicing it repeatedly with an Exacto-knife. It's really surprising that I've not injured myself before. Because I actually come from a long line of limb-losers (okay, just my mom. And, alright, she's just big-toe-less due to some freakish toe-in-bicycle-spoke accident. My fave part of that story is that her brother had to hold the detached toe all the way to the hospital. This also ended her foot modeling career.)

  

After tracing the paper circle onto a piece of paper, I wrote out the quote in sharpie and traced it onto some sort of linen-y fabric in pencil. Which is totally not how you are supposed to go about doing embroidery. Something about pinning it to your fabric, sewing through the paper design and later removing the paper with tweezers. What?! No. That sounds like time better spent doing other things. Like eating food off the floor.

When I was all finished embroidering (which, by the way, have you seen the embroidery on this dress?! Now I look more chump-y than normal. Thanks, Lauren), I busted out my fave glue. Have you ever used this stuff? I like to imagine the creator, Aleene, being some big bouffant'ed and bejeweled Southerner who was all like, "Elmer's glue?! Pshaw, honey, I need something much tackier than that if Ima gonna glue all these here shells to this here lamp. I'll just make my own glue with some Crisco and boiled down opossum." See? And you thought I was only pickin' on the Kiwis and the Canadians. Oh, naw. I'm an equal opportunity picker-on'er.

After slathering my Aleene's Tacky Glue all over the backside of the mirror, I placed the embroidery on top and used the aforementioned Exacto to shove the stray bits of fabric under the lip of the mirror.

After hanging the mirror on my sewing room wall, I felt it needed a little something more. So I added the little candy cane stripped ribbon and called it finished.

Coco Chanel sprinkling her fabulous classiness on one of her signature dresses.

And there you have it. A little embroidered reminder for me to strive toward the classy and fabulous. Which I totally forgot to do during my Multiple Doctors Appointment Day. In an attempt to be efficient, I scheduled both an eye and, ahem, a lady-parts doctor appointment in one day. This being the day after the Food Processing Blade Incident. So, imagine if you will, an eyes dilated, limpy and bandaged foot goofball stumbling into, for lack of a better term, the legs-in-stirrups room. The alarmed look on the nurse's face caused me to blurt out:

"I swear to you I'm not all jacked up on bath salts!"

"Uh, okay. What happened to you?"

"Oh, I just, you know, dropped a food processing blade on my foot that, you'll appreciate this, I bandaged with a tampon. I had to get a couple of stitches. And I was just at the eye doctor so my pupils are all coke-head huge."

"Uh, okay. I'm going to get the doctor now."

Aw, don't act like Coco Chanel wouldn't have done the very same thing. Chat at ya soon, ya'll!

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DIY: Floral Embroidery

So, do you remember that floral embroidery sneak-peak I shared with you here? Well, I finally finished it! But if you want to read more, you'll have to head over to one of my favorite blogs, The Little Red Squirrel.

Sweet Katie, the creative mind behind The Little Red Squirrel, is on vacation in Paris (I had to photoshop my green-with-envy face) and asked me if I wouldn't mind being a guest blogger for her. I shared with her readers my floral embroidery DIY. I do hope you'll take a look and add her blog to your blog reader, it's fantastic!

And thanks again, Katie, it was a delight. Enjoy your holiday!

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Weekend Adventure: Back and Forth

I love this turtle mosaic by the Tennessee artist Sherri Warner Hunter. This guy was featured with several large mosaic fish and a lizard bench at a rest stop on the way to Chattanooga.

This weekend, hubs and I took a road trip to Chattanooga, Tennessee. Now, if ya'll aren't from around these parts, Chattanooga is a sweet town most famous for it's Lookout Mountain. To access the mountain, you can take what's called the Incline Railway which is a sort of train car that halls you at a near 75 degree angle to the top. It is not for the faint of heart.

It's about a two hour drive to Chat from Nashville. On my lap was my latest embroidery project. I'm working from a vintage dictionary with the best illustrations. I can't wait to share with you the finished product...but it might be a while.

Having done the Incline before, we passed on it. Besides we had other things on our agenda. Me, I was all about the vintage, antique and thrift shops. Hubs? Well, if you must know, it was the donut shop. Seriously. We drove two hours for donuts.

Not just any donuts, mind you, Julie Darling Donuts. They were pretty fab. We sampled the red velvet, blueberry and the glazed. None of them were your traditional donut: the glazed was amazing with a bread like texture; the blueberry was crispy on the outside like it had been deep fried and the red velvet had an incredible cream cheese frosting. They also had a bacon donut and an Oreo covered number that looked pretty interesting.

Chattanooga is a pretty arsty town with sculptures and paintings along their river front. I took piano lessons for years, but those of you that know me, know the real piano story. Those of you that don't know this infamous tale, let's just say it involves an Amish piano-tuning dude, my mother and something you'd never thought you'd find inside a piano.

After devouring our donuts, we walked along the riverfront venturing into shops. I managed to do a little damage at one antique store before we hit Lupi's Pizza.

One of my finds: I picked up this sweet little bird tray at The Knitting Mill Antiques. I loved it's unique diamond shape. Perfect for holding my wool snippets and my hook. The little snippets can be felted and made into things like this sweet pin cushion.

Our intent was to stay over in Chat...but to be honest, we felt like we'd done what we came to do: eat deliciously naughty food and buy other people's junk. To Do, Ta Done.

Getting home early allowed me to finish another square in my rug hooking! The flower took a lot longer than the geometric design but I'm really excited with the result.

The variegated yellow wool and the maroon wool that are outlining the flower are both from recycled clothing. I cannot wait to start on my next square. But I have entirely too many other things on my Shoulda-Gotten-Done-Five-Days-Ago list to even think about that.

Okay, the real reason we drove all the way to Chattanooga and back again? This sweet face.

Not only that, but someone has staked her claim in my wool storage! And, lemme tell you, if you even attempt to pull out a strand of wool on her watch, she'll shred you to bits with those claws. So, until she moves on, looks like I'll working on that embroidery!

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