DIY: The Armpit Blowout

"Vintage 911, please state your emergency."..."Well, aside from what looks like Little Shop of Horrors growing out the side of my head, I've just experienced an Arm Pit Blowout! Please send help right away!"

One thing I've learned shopping vintage is to always check the pits. I don't know the toxic makeup of sweat (nor do I wanna) but what I can tell you for certain is that it can mess up some clothes. You see, the sweat not only stains the fabric but can also break it down, leading to The Armpit Blowout. And while the added circulation of air in a hot vintage dress is nice, comments like, "Dude, you have a hole in your armpit...wow, do you ever shave?!" are not welcome. Or appreciated. And, yes, I do shave. Sometimes.

I'm always curious about vintage labels so I did a little googling on Jonathan Logan and found out...there actually was no Jonathan Logan. Dun dun duuuunnnnn!

This lovely dress has been in my closet for ages. Like, since high school. It's got more issues than the pit problem (note the stain under the belt) but I just couldn't let it go. So I decided to iron all of those yards of taffeta and give it some TLC.

That's right. Turns out Jonathan Logan was a popular maker of young women’s dresses – geared to the young, but not the super trendy. Think classy and dressy like Anne Taylor or something. The designers were actually women: Dorris Varnum, and Jeanne Carr.

So these J.L. designs are just a little, uh, smug. Around the neck. And at the waist. Throw in the non-stretch taffeta and it felt like I was in a straight jacket. I experienced a moment of near claustrophobic panic when zipping myself up and wondered if I actually would need to dial 911. "Please send help right away, I'm trapped inside a vintage dress!"

The Armpit Blowout.

As you can see, the tear was big but not bad. Meaning, it was definitely a patch fix. Trying to sew this back together would have lead to too many seams.

A Patchy Pit.

Super easy. A little cutting and ironing and my pit was as good as new.

Since the nature of taffeta is to tear easily, I added a straight stitch for reinforcement.

From the outside. Hey, I didn't say it'd be a Pretty Patchy Pit.

So I've never worn taffeta before and lemme tell you, this stuff is noisy when you walk. It spooked the cat so much she hid under the bed.

Mysterious brown stains are never attractive.

Now, here's where I need your help. I have no idea what this stain is nor how to remove it. Any suggestions from you vintage-lovers or clothes-cleaners out there? I would so love to restore this sweet dress to it's original Jonathan Logan loveliness.

"Oh, Betty, you know I don't wear aprons because I cook! They're to hide the stains on my vintage garb, you silly!" Completely adorable poodle apron from the lovely etsy shop: skywayvintage.

 Whew, near vintage catastrophe solved! I hope you enjoyed this little segment of Vintage 911 as I'm thinking this is going to be a new post series. I have a mountain of vintage in need of TLC and I'm hoping this will motivate me to attack it. And I'd love to hear your ideas on solving the Brown Stain Situation.

 Thanks for dropping by and have a lovely end of the week.

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What the Art Teacher Wore #28

Brooklyn Bridge Monday: dress: Anthro, sale, couple summers ago; necklace: dunno, Target maybe?; hair accessory: the marvelous Peachy Tuesday

Please pardon me if I sound a little bit Eeyore-esque in this post but I said good bye to one of my favorite friends this week: Summer. On Thursday my days of traveling, estate-saling, fro-yo-for-dinner'ing ended. Don't get me wrong, I'm thrilled for the upcoming school year and our European theme in the art room. It's just that, well, I'm gonna miss all of my free time. And fro yo. 

Along with WIWTW, I'm sharing some more photos from my NYC in 48 hours. Well, with the exception of one day...I'm sure you'll be able to figure out which when you do some downward scrollin'. 

In other news, the polling has closed on the DIY Eiffel Tower Dress. If you recall, the question was: Should I bedazzle the dress some more or leave it as is? It seems the majority of you are on the side of my hubs (thanks a lot, ya'll. Humph.) and are in the please stop the tackifying camp. I appreciate your taking the time to vote and I've decided...to leave the dress as is. Partly because you are right and the other partly because my ADHD has caused me to move on to other things. Like more poodles. Possibly in tutu's. Definitely wearing berets. Is it fro yo time yet?

Such a beauty, the Brooklyn Bridge.

Traffic in NYC Tuesday: "Well, as you can see, Bob, the traffic in Chelsea is flowing along just fine." This silly photo was taken on the High Line in Chelsea. dress: thrifted, Issac Mizrahi; bow belt: Anthro

Just a glimpse of the awesomeness that is Purl Soho.

Back to School Thursday: That's right, I skipped Wednesday. It was a bit of a long day what with flying home and heading straight to the eye doc afterword (notice the glasses?), grocery shopping and unpacking. By the time I remembered I hadn't taken a photo, I was in my pajamas. And I'm not ready to share that much with you. dress and sweater: sale, Anthro; sandals: Frye

Dino bones at the Natural History Museum.

Eiffel Tower Dress Friday: This is my first Bernie Dexter dress and I love it. It's so well made and I adore the little red piping. Not to mention the Eiffel Tower print -- eep! Must make more room in el closet for her designs. She even has a dress with a Matisse print. dress: Bernie Dexter; shoes: BC, old; hair flower: made by moi

A student project with a Barbie theme on display at FIT. My fave is the Barbie and poodle on the left.

Back in Tennessee Saturday: My family (my mom and my in-laws) were in town this weekend. We decided to go see the stock car races in Clarksville which is always an adventure. This particular race track is a clay track. That means every time the cars came around the bend, they were spraying us with clay pellets. Yeah, we ain't in NYC no more, kids. dress: vintage, dyed and altered by me; sweater: Anthro; sandals: Chacos

Crazy fun. By the end of the night we were picking clay bits out of each others hair. If it looks like I have a spray tan in the above photo, I do. We call it the Stock Car Clay Spray Special.

I do believe the rules of the track apply to my art room.

My sweet students arrive this Thursday! I cannot wait to see them. Until then, it's more meetings for me. Maybe a "pill draw" window would help me make it through those. Kidding, kidding!

Enjoy your week.

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What the Art Teacher Wore #23

Beautiful Bamberg Monday: That is, once we found the place. Our GPS was giving us fits (switching from German to English to mute when important decisions like "Do I take the autobahn now?!" needed to be made) and our gas station attendant friend could only point down the road and say "go straight on". But we made it! sweater: vintage, thrifted; dress: vintage, The Hip Zipper; belt: Pinky Otto; sandals: Chacos

 Well, we're back! What a fun week and a half we spent in Germany and the Netherlands. I think I may be cured of my jet lag (a bedtime of 7:30pm last night and a 10 hour sleep just may have done the trick) and I'm now ready to tackle unpacking.

 But first things first, what I wore around town and country. This week I decided to include some photos of the towns we visited as well. If you live in these cities or have visited them, I'd love to hear your stories about these incredible places...especially shopping recommendations! Thanks for stopping by.

This town celebrated it's 1000th birthday back in '73, can you imagine? There were witch trials here back during the 17th century. It's full of so many rolling hills and beautiful churches it's reminiscent of Rome, which the locals refer to as the "Italian Bamberg." They so silly.

An Amsterdam Evening: Hubs drove a caravan of us from Bavaria to the Netherlands. It was a beautiful day for a drive...until we hit Frankfurt and sat in traffic for a bit. But we made it! sweater: Mini-Boden, thrifted; dress: Ann Taylor, thrifted; belt and flower: H & M; sandals: Chacos...again. My only preferred footwear during this trip

Such a fun city to walk around and explore...given you don't get run over by the one bah-jillion people on bicycles.

Gettin' Cheesy: We decided to take a day trip to the sweet town of Alkmaar. It's most famous for it's incredibly amazing, mouth-watering cheese. And adorable kalliopes, like this biggin'. At least we think that's what this large music box thing was. sweater and dress: vintage, thrifted; scarf: picked up at some little shop in Germany; belt and flower: made by me

Alkmaar is also home to a Beatles museum. Apparently John Lennon's first guitar was made there.

We decked in and out of several cheese shops but this one was the best. They had samples of every cheese in the shop which we helped ourselves to. My favorites were the blue cheese (which was so strong I literally pounded the counter a couple of times as if I was downing tequila) and the wasabi and pesto infused cheeses. I tried to ask if they had any Cheese Whiz but I guess they just aren't that advanced yet.

Hubs and I took an evening trip to the town of Haarlem which is the historical center of the tulip bulb-growing district and has the nickname 'Bloemenstad' (flower city), for this reason. We didn't spot a single tulip though as they are now out of season.

Nowhere like Amsterdam: Seriously, it's amazing. I now want to buy myself a salmon pink Schwinn with a basket on the front and a bell on the handlebars and cruise everywhere. dress: Viva, picked up in Germany

I hadn't been to Amsterdam since I was there in college. I did some student teaching in Ireland and made my way over to the Netherlands, Italy and Belgium afterwords. It was so fun to walk through the train station and find the hostel and little Italian place I once ate at again.

A rare photo of hubs. He's was so nice to take all of my outfit photos. Usually it's just me and my tripod. This background is amazing as it looks totally phony baloney.

Leaving on a Jet Plane Friday: Time to head home. We were missing our kitty. Little did we know it would be one million degrees when we got home, ugh! dress: Mango, picked up in Alkmaar; tights: Target; scarf: Germany

Hubs and I had separate seats on the plane. No worries, I had Jes to hang out with. The poor guy sitting next to me immediately caught on to my crazy ways and pretended to sleep all eight hours. I got some great photos of Jes resting with him! (gah, just kidding, silly man kept waking up)

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What the Art Teacher Wore #20

Strawberry-Fields-Forever-Monday: On this day we returned to Nashville from our Orlando vacation. And you know what returning from vacation means: laundry. Thankfully, that's hubs job. So I took a nap. top: this place in Nashville called UHL or something. URL? I forget, it's on West End if you are local; skirt and belt: thrifted and vintage; flower: H&M; shoes: nada, it's summer

Happy End-of-the-Week to you, friends! I don't know what the weather is like where you are, but in Nashville, Tennessee the weather has been divine. A couple of months ago, when we were supposed to be transitioning from winter to summer, Mother Nature, in all of her in-need-of-some-serious-prozac glory, decided to skip spring and deliver us endless days of hot sticky heat. This week she relaxed a little bit and we had the most beautiful and mild of spring-like days. 

Maybe I was a little delusional because of the lovely weather, but each outfit this week reminded me of a song. So, for your listening pleasure, here you are. I'd love to hear which song strikes a cord with you. Hope Mother Nature is on your side and your day is just lovely!

Love this video of the four running around being their silly awesome selves. See it here.

I-Never-Promised-You-A-Rose-Garden-Tuesday: This day was a fun and full one, meeting up with some art teacher buddies for a birthday celebration. dress: vintage; sandals: old, Target; sunglasses: ebay; flower: made by me

Love this song...but in the short clip, her floor-length minty green striped dress with matching shoes is a sight to behold. Take a look-see.

That's-Amore-Wednesday: This was an errand-running-catching-up-on-a-belt-order kind of day. I felt very much like I should be out on a gondola in that top. top: Forever 21; belt and skirt: vintage, thrifted; sandals: Lucky Brand

Okay, you must stop what you are doing and immediately go check out Dean Martin here. You won't regret it.

Girls-Girls-Girls-Thursday: Our terrific trip to Graceland which you can read more about here. On Quincy: swimsuit: Lena Hoscheck; skirt: Quincy has her own vintage-inspired clothing line and this skirt is from there. You must visit her shop here. On Emma: Emma's make up and hair is always stunning, which you can see on her beautiful blog. dress: Anthropologie. On me: dress: vintage, The Hip Zipper

Nothing says summer like this short clip by our friend at Graceland. Thank you, Elivs, for all of your awesomeness.

Summertime-Friday: On this day a buddy and I scored big at several garage sales. Thankfully this buddy noticed that I'd been walking around with my dress only half-way zipped up (eep!) before I went off to catch up with friend I'd not seen in years. I can't imagine what impression that would have made! dress: You tired of this dress yet? It's my summertime fave. Forever21; sandals: Sseko with straps sewn by me.

I love Sam Cooke and I really love his version of the song Summertime. He actually did another version here ... to be enjoyed with a video of some guy doing crazy stunts down a water slide...whah?

But I have a big soft spot for Janis. I love her...and I love seeing this recording session with her and the Big Brother Holding Company.

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What the Art Teacher Wore #9

Just-in-from-NYC Monday: The great thing about soft and fuzzy sweaters is their soft fuzziness. The bad thing about soft and fuzzy sweaters is that a hundred little grubby hands want to touch them. Although we did have a nice little chat about the difference between angora, wool  and acrylic yarn. sweater: Ann Taylor, thrifted; dress: Anthropologie purchased at Buffalo Exchange in NYC; belt: Pinkyotto, a little boutique in NYC; shoes: Dolls by Nina

 Oh what a wacky week this one has been. It started off with a return home from a fantastic trip to NYC. And like any trip, I always feel like I could use a day or three to recuperate. Thankfully I was able to return to a smooth sailing ship as I'd left Lauren at the helm. But Wednesday was her last day! Neither of us are good at goodbyes so we just said a sad goodbye-for-now and pretended that Thursday wouldn't come. But it did. And my room was so quite without her. When the kids walked in and looked around, they turned to me in a panic and asked, "Where's Ms. Goodwin?!" Thankfully, she'd promised to return on Friday to which they sighed a whew! of relief.

Friday ended up being a rather Freaky Friday what with the full moon, our school's half day and my birthday. The kids were beside themselves wishing me a happy birthday and asking if I liked the gift they worked on with Ms. Goodwin. Er, gift? Wha? When she dropped in with the book she created with all of the kids in the school, I just lost it. Right in front of the kids. A near blubbery meltdown. I mean, it was the most touching gift I've received in a very long time. I promise to share it (and my other fab gifties) in an upcoming post. But have your tissue handy. It's a tear-jerker.

My birthday plans for the weekend? Sleeping in. Cleaning this house. Reading my sweet book from the kids. I do hope you enjoy yours whatever you decide to do!

I am so much in love with this belt that I regret not having bought more. I checked their online shop...but no such luck. Sadness. Guess I'll just have to make a return visit to the East Village.

Look at that sweet face! I was so excited to see her upon my return. She did a fantastic job teaching the kids while I was away. I don't even think they knew I was gone! Her cute dress is an Old Navy number and her boots are from the Nashville Flea Market.

Trench Coat Tuesday: Okay, I have to tell you, I once saw this girl wearing a full skirt trench coat and I almost died. Like, my heart stopped and I couldn't breath and everything. It was gorge! So when I saw this one at Goodwill I just had to have it. And since it was missing it's belt, I've just been using strips of fabric that match my outfit to singe the waist.

sweater: thrifted a million years ago, the sweet little pearls are falling off but I just love the thing to bits; dress: Target, thrifted; tights: Target; shoes: Clarks

I love this look, don't you? I'm a sucker for bringing an outfit together with pops of color and Lauren did this beautifully.

Becoming-Monet's-Garden Wednesday: Here's a photo I took at the MOMA last weekend. The kids are currently studying Monet and working on a Monet-inspired mural. To introduce Monet and celebrate Lauren's last day (sniff), we decided to dress as Monet's garden as twins (which is kinda funny cuz Lauren has a twin!). She even made us matching water lily hair clips and let me install a bumpit in her hair. Because we're corny like that. Don't hate.

both sweaters and my dress: vintage, thrifted; lauren's dress, shoes and tights: Target; belts: made by me; my shoes: thrifted

Do-You-Have-the-Time Thursday: So I finally finished this dress. It was a DIY headache but I'll share more with you on that in a later post. sweater: vintage, thrifted; dress: Plato's Closet; tights: a fantastic fellow etsy seller whose shop is here: http://www.etsy.com/shop/TejaJamilla?ref=pr_shop_more

It's-My-Party-I'll-Dress-Like-a-Cupcake Friday: Yay! It's my birthday! I have decided that I don't care about the number anymore. It just keeps increasing like my IQ. sweater: vintage, thrifted; dress: Buffalo Exchange in Soho; tights: Target; shoes and bag: Irregular Choice

Okay, I love these shoes by Irregular Choice. Seriously. I mean, just look at them -- they've got it all -- dangly charms, polka dots, a clear heel, what's not to love? I tracked down their store in Soho and it was just as wild as these shoes. I knew I had to get them and a matching purse as my NYC birthday gift to myself.

To announce the upcoming book fair which has a beachy theme, my P.E. Teacher buddy and I dressed the part. Except she surprised me at the end by giving me the birthday hat, balloons and a hardy "happy birthday" song. On the morning announcements. In front of the whole school. Ah, vengeance will be mine!

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