DIY: A Splatter-Paintin'/Jackson Pollock-y Hybrid Dress

Oh mah goodness, the dress that's been haunting my sewing room for ages is finally complete! Paired with my DIY palette hair clip and some sparkly flats from Anthropologie.

I'll have you know that I'm one of those super duper annoying people that tells the same joke over and over. AND, if you don't laugh the first time, Ima gonna assume it's not because you don't find me highly entertaining, it's just that your ears are broken and you're kinda dumb. Therefore, said not-worthy-of-a-laugh joke will be repeated, this time only louder and slower for your listening (dis)pleasure.

Dudes, when am I gonna learn to work this lil point-n-shoot camera of mine correctly? I mean, this photo's got more grain that a bowl of FiberOne.

Case in point: When I wore this dress on our final day of Painting Processes in the art room. Details of that Super Happy Fun Insanity to come but until then, lemme break it down for ya: 20 children + paint + instruments of mass painting destruction = one awesomely painted mess.  So my repeated joke of choice to anyone who happened to venture into the art room mid-madness? 

"My dress was actually white this morning!"

When my hilarity was met with a blank stare, I restated my standup routine this time explaining my joke. Because that always helps:

"You know. It was white. And then it got paint on it. [unchanged blank stare = digging myself into an even bigger unfunny joke hole] Because, with all the glue huffing, the kids went kinda bonkers, tied me down and splattered paint all over me."

And just when I think I mighta gotten through to Super-Slow-Joke-Getter, some kid'll blow it and shout across the room, "Nuh huh! We don't even know how to tie!"

While I'm pretty pleased with the fit and finish, I'm not loving the wrinkled look of the red midriff. Whassup? I'm guessin my interfacing should not have been an adhesive one. My thought is that the adhesive is causing the midriff to wrinkle. What do you think, sewing sistahs?

Yeah. So I guess I won't be quittin' my day job and takin' my standup out on the road. Cuz knowing my luck, I'd have my students in the audience razzing me the whole time. Which is kinda like my everyday life. Seriously! In fact, just yesterday when I said, "Okay, kids, it's time to start cleaning up." One of my fourth graders raised his hand and said:

"Mrs. Stephens, we don't clean on Fridays. We have the day off. Sorry."

I. Get. No. Respect.

Le sigh. Let's chat about this new dress o' mine shall we? Before I fall into a deep dark nobody-likes-me/everybody-hates-me/why-don't-I-just-eat-dirt depression. I got the notion that I needed some Back-to-School dresses and scooped several yards of this splattery fabric a month ago. I quickly began working on the bodice using this well-loved Simplicity pattern of mine.

 

Then I decided to break up all that splattery goodness a bit. For this idea, I used the wide waist band from my vintage Simplicity pattern. After the bodice was complete, I seriously had 6 yards of the fabric left. Just enough to try my hand at my very first circle skirt with that vintage Butterick pattern on the right. With the use of three patterns, it's like a ménage à trois dress. But without the awkward sleeping arrangement.

Can you believe the size of this thing?! I loved that I didn't have to mess with any gathering business as I've done with so many other dresses...until I had to hem this beast. And I wasn't about to do that by hand. Are you kidding me? I ran that thing through my machine as fast as I could and it still took me up to an hour to complete.

I'm thinking I need a brand new, extra fluffy crinoline to showcase the endless yards of splattery goodness, don't you think?

 

Because this fabric totally has a Jackson Pollock thing happening, I got this crazy notion to create a dress for each of our Artists of the Month. If you recall, I created this little number when the kids were learning about Hokusai last month and now I've got this Pollock-y frock complete. The only prob? Andy Warhol is our featured artist this month! Which means I've got some work to do...but at least I've got Pollock ready when his month comes up. My goal by the end of the school year is to have created 10 artist-themed dresses. Wish me luck, ya'll.

Oh! And those Painting Processes I was telling you about? Well, here's what the art room tables looked like before...

...and by the end of the day. Take a close look at that once-white table covering. Looks just like the fabric of my dress, doncha think? Next time, I'm just throwing some white cotton cloth on the tables, ya'll.

At the rate the kids are going, I'll have enough fabric to create several of these Splatter-Paintin'/Jackson Pollock-y dresses. Stay tuned for more details of our Painting Processes in the art room. Until then, have a fantasticly splatterific week!

What the Art Teachers Wore #75

Purplish Monday: This photo cracks me up. Partly because we look ridiculous (and this is actually one of the better photos) but mostly cuz I know that after spending a couple more weeks with me,  Rebecca is gonna be striking this pose right before lifting me up and tossing me on the ground, WWE style. I have that effect on people. on me, dress: Anthro, thrifted with $198 price tag still on it, ya'll!; shoes: Fluevog

Happy Loooong Weekend, friends! I do hope your Labor Day was void of any such labor and full of lounging laziness. Mine certainly has been. Shoot, it's already 4:30pm and I'm still in my pajamas. Like a boss.

This past week certainly was a wild and crazy time in the art room. We tried our hand at Painting Processes with the kids (more details to come) which pretty much meant we were finding paint where no paint has gone before. Yes, seriously. To compensate for that crazy, our kindergarten artists were absolutely rockin' it this week...and then the icing on the cake, or rather, the soy sauce on the sushi, was receiving this huge platter of said goodness from one of the fourth grade kids.

I can only hope that this upcoming week is just as awesome.

Oh! And because I'm being super lazy today, I'm simply including snapshots of this week, no featured artists. I know, bad art teacher blogger. I'll try harder next week ('though I wouldn't count on it!).

Until next time, enjoy your 4-day work week! Yay, Labor Day -- you are simply the gift that keeps on giving.

I know, right?! Mouth watering? Sudden hankerin' for sushi? I just happened to have this huge stash of brand new/still in the package restaurant chop sticks for the kids to enjoy their sushi with. The sweet guy whose mother made the sushi gave us a demo on how to break apart and hold our chop sticks. Watching the kids attempt this was quite hilarious. They enjoyed it so much.

Brown Tuesday: Okay, so I'm wearing these fugly Crocs because my feet were Over It. One of my sweet first grade girls walked in and pointed to the high heels I HAD been wearing and said, "Aw, why aren't you wearing THOSE shoes? They are much cuter!" So, of course, I had to do a shoe change! dress: vintage; belt: Pin Up Girl Clothing

Painting Processes! So Rebecca has planned these awesome collage projects for the kids. The first phase was having them create a huge assortment of textured, splattered, sponged and dry brushed papers. We covered the tables, took away the chairs, strapped aprons on 'em and turned 'em lose. Kinda. We attempted control with a train whistle. Pretty sure a taser woulda worked better but the administration looks down on that sort of thing. Softies.

Black and White Wednesday: It's still Color Week in kindergarten which has made getting dressed in the morning So Stinkin' Easy. dress: $20 at Anthro!; sweater and tank: Target; shoes: Crocs

Okay, I love this. Can I have this as a fabric? It's funny, I'm currently creating a somethun-somethun with a very similar motif. I hope to have it completed this evening so I can share it with you this week.

Fave Color Thursday: What you are looking at here are two people who conquered 3 back-to-back 45 minute kindergarten classes WITH NO BATHROOM BREAK and are still standing and smiling. I had my doubts though...especially when I witnessed one sweet VERY allergic-to-peanuts child slathering glue on paper and licking it off. I had to read the label on the bottle to make sure the stuff wasn't made in some sort of peanut-ty factory. dress: vintage, thrifted; belt: made by me; shoes: BC

After completing their line-paper sculptures, kindergarten-town moved onto painting lines. I love the focus of this little dude.

Wear Any Ol' Color, It's Friday, Ya'll!: One of the kids said to Rebecca, "I get to see you tomorrow, I hope you look pretty!" Of course she does, I mean, look at that HAIR! dress: vintage, thrifted and so small it's hardly wearable; belt and shoes: Anthro

Hubs and I have had a super relaxing weekend. We did go one a crazy 8 mile hike (where we saw this sweet little guy) that just about killed me. Which reminded me that I really outta get out more. But next time, I'm taking a Segway.

DIY: Embossed Ceramicness

So I might be having a little bit of a love affair with pale-sky-aqua blue, faded-rose pink and, well,  pastels in general. Proof of such here and here.

Sometimes when people are inclined to talk to me (which I don't recommend to the easily offended, annoyed or grossed out by stories involving pants wetting accidents and pee puddles [which, btw, is up next on this blog post menu]), they ask me stuff. Stuff that leads me to believe that they must read my blog and assume the following:

1. That I make stuff all the freaking time.

2.  That I also dress like a moron all the freaking time.

One of these things is as false as Miley Cyrus virginity rumors. Can you guess which?

If you guessed the first then, ding-ding-ding!, you are correct! Congratulations! You win absolutely nothing but my utter respect at your guessing skillz. Really. I mean, you should consider joining the circus and being one of those weight-guessing people. I hear the pay is incredible. 

Which means the crazy notion that I'm a making-stuff-maniac is totes false, ya'll. Truth be told, I spend entirely too much of my life online googling things like "dorky art teacher clothes" (can you guess whose mug pops up first? Use those expert guessing skills of yours...) and chatting up long lost buddies on Facebook. Which is what I was doing last night when a class photo from elementary school was posted. Next thing I know, it's past midnight and I've been reminiscing about favorite teachers and crazy classmate antics with people I've not spoken to since the 5th grade. Time well spent for sure. Meanwhile, my sewing projects/unglazed ceramic pieces/half finished paintings of nude leprechauns (just seeing if you were paying attention) are left collecting dust. Das my life for realz, ya'll.

I've also got this terrible habit of starting something and then callin' it quits midway through. Sometimes I return to said DIY -n- Ditch but it's often weeks, nay, months later. Case in point: my Embossed Ceramicness. Last November I attended the annual state art conference in the town of Gatlinburg, Tennessee where the allure of the airbrushed t-shirt never dies. I took a course that involved this pretty sweet process of using your printing block as a ceramic embosser. I began by creating the above masterpiece.

And transferring the design to my linoleum block. This was done by scribbling on the back of my drawing, taping the drawing to my block and then going back over my pencil lines. At this point the carving commenced.

This squirrel-tastic block was carved by my awesome art teacher buddy Mallory. One of the things I love about attending these workshops is you get to hang out with your favorite artsy friends. And you make so many new buddies who do a much better job at commiserating about life in the art room than, well, your hubs. Cuz new art teacher friends don't get that glazed-over "is this gonna be another kid peeing themselves story?!" look like that dude who lives in my house and breathes my air. Nay (yeah, I just used that word twice in one post like a boss), new artsy buddies slap you a high five and commend you for your tales of how you turned lemons into lemonade. Or, rather, puddles of pee into a "Pond, kids! Don't step in the pond because you don't want to get wet!" (this actually happened...which was met with a "Yeah, cuz that pond is PEE!" by a dear kindergartener).

One friend I made at an art conference years ago has since become a dear friend of mine. Her name is Debbie and she carved this block which I'm thrilled to say I have a ceramic copy of. I can't wait to get it glazed and out for Halloween. I'll be sure to share it with you soonish.

Okay, where was I? Ah, yes, the carved block. Is it any wonder I don't finish much? I can't even stay focused on one lil blog post! Once the carving was finished, a slab of clay was placed over it. That was either rolled out or run through a slab roller. From there we had the option of turning our embossed piece into a vase, a mug or a slab. I did a little of each.

And that was way the flip back in November. It wasn't until recently that I busted out the glaze and forced myself to finish these pieces. The completed slab in the top photo was mounted onto a wooden flower box.

While these lovelies have found their home at my front door. Finally. After months of hanging out in the Land of Forgotten DIY's, they are now complete. Who woulda ever guessed I'd get 'em done?! Well, you, of course. What with your intuitive guessing skills and all.

Until next time, friends, STAY AWAY FROM YELLOW PUDDLES! 

And have a great holiday weekend.

What the Art Teacher Wore #74

Wearing Red Monday: Okay, lest you think I force my amazing student teacher to wear certain attire, it was Color Week in Kindergarten-land. Hence the Red. But don't hold me to that not-telling-her-what-to-wear bit. Because once she got her lessons planned, corresponding outfits were the next step. As it should be, right? (Although, I'm just gonna out myself and say that there might have been one or twenty occasions where the outfit came first and the lesson second. It's called priorities, peeps.) my dress: DIY here; shoes: Crocs; belt: Pin Up Girl Clothing. I'll do better this upcoming week finding the source of Rebecca's attire.

Well, look, ya'll! I've got a partner-in-art-teaching-crime! Meet Rebecca Tenpenny, student art teacher extraordinaire*. I'm so thrilled to have Rebecca in my art room for the next several weeks (ya'll, she's already teaching! How awesome is that?!). The units she has planned are so exciting that I almost can't wait to see the finished result...but I have a feeling that the process is going to be so stinkin' fun that I'm trying to pace myself. And, yes, I am torturing her with outfit photos...the above being our first attempt. We were going for some sort of sorority girl pose and ended up doing the kindergarten "I-Gotta-Use-It" stance. I'd say the photos get better...but as you'll see, they, um, don't. 

One of Rebecca's lessons is based on the artist Andy Warhol. Oh, Andy. How I loved you in high school (and still do, don't get me wrong...it's just that Andy was my first artist love). I had The Velvet Underground on replay, demanded a subscription to Interview magazine for Christmas and copied so many of his prints that I coulda been dubbed Andy Wanna-be. So I'm stoked about this project the kids will be doing. Art teacher buddies, what Warhol-inspired lessons have you done with your students? Lemme know cuz I totally wanna steal them.

Until we chat again, later, dudes!

Andrew Warhola (that's right, did you know there used to be an "a" at the end of that name? After it was once misspelled without an "a", Warhol decided to go with the change) was the youngest of four boys born in 1928 in Pittsburgh. His parents were immigrants from Slovakia. As a young boy, Warhol developed this illness that caused skin pigmentation blotchiness. For that reason, dude spent a lot time bedridden, surrounded by his sketch books, magazines of movie stars and the company of his mother. Later, Warhol would call this the period of his life where he developed as an artist.

Another constant during his childhood was the entertainment of the radio. I can only guess that many commercials lead to his interest in popular culture as that was the world he was surrounded in.

When the kids were looking at these works of art by Warhol today, they were asked "What do you wonder...?" To which one girl replied, "I wonder if there are sparkles in those cans! Or paint!" To which another said, "Um, I think it's soup. And he really likes it."

Mellow Yellow Tuesday: So Rebecca's got this super awesome last name: Tenpenny. It's received a lot of feedback from the kids. My fave was when Rebecca asked the kids just how much ten pennies would be. One second grader replied, "It would be one dime. And we can't call you Miss One Dime because that would be ridiculous." So true. dress: vintage Swirl dress I got for cheapish; flower: made by me; shoes: Shoe Carnival

Lou Reed and Nico? Seriously? Does it get any better when you are a wannabe beatnik/hippie high schooler? Warhol managed the band and they were the house band during The Factory era.

Geez, love this album. Uprooting it tonight.

Feeling Blue Monday: Okay, more like feeling black and blue due to the beating the kindergarten gave us. Granted, it was their first day ever in art...and I have them for 45 minutes at a time...AND I had three said 45 minute classes back-to-back (which had me and Rebecca doing that "I-Gotta-Use-It" pose by the end). But still. They. Ate. Our Lunch. Not gonna happen this week. Oh no. We have plans to divide, taser and conquer (kidding! ish.) dress: vintage, Buffalo Exchange; palette pin: gift from a friend; shoes: BC Shoes, old

Speaking of The Factory, Warhol's famous studio that brought together all walks of life, what would you pay to be a fly on the wall at one of those bashes? I'd like to think that only the coolest and most intelligent and funny walks of life hung out here...which I'd also like to think wouldn't mean the likes of some twerkin' Miley Cyrus. {shudders}.

I gotta tell you, while I'm fascinated with Warhol, the ideas behind his work and that whole era of awesomeness, I don't think I like Warhol as a person. From what I've read, he would love you (figuratively, in the case of Edie Sedgwick) then leave you. Once you boosted his ego and celebrity status, he was done with you. That doesn't sound like the kinda person I'd wanna call a friend. 

Green Day Thursday: I have another "Tenpenny"ism. After introducing herself, one of the kids asked, "Doesn't she have more than ten pennies?"...to which Rebecca replied, "No, I'm a teacher." So true. dress: vintage, thrifted

But there are a lot of artist jerks in the world (and just jerks, period)...and that doesn't lessen the impact a dude like Warhol had. I mean, the guy practically invented Pop Art (with a lil help from Lichtenstein, Rauschenberg and Oldenburg), there's no denying his genius.

Okay, I was disappointed that several classes didn't know who this was. I mean, c'mon, we live in Tennessee! It's Johnny Cash, ya'll (...just kidding! I know it's Bob Seger.)

Orange You Glad It's FRIDAY?!: Ya'll, I love teaching. But, honestly, these last three weeks have been the longest known to man, not gonna lie. dress: The Limited; belt: gift from a friend; necklace: Target; crinoline: thrifted

Can I just tell you that after a great little discussion about Warhol that totally impressed me, I called on a hand-raiser only to be asked, "Is he about to pick his nose?!" Yeah. That's it. Way to dash my hopes and dreams, ya'll. Although, you gotta admit, it does kinda look like it...

* I'll have you know that Rebecca's not my first incredible student teacher. I had the Amazing Carly B. several years ago and the Talented Lauren Reese just last year. You can see what Lauren and I wore here.

What the Art Teacher Wore #73

Trip-Takin' Monday: Since we'll be traveling to Asia this year, I decided to break out my Suitcase Skirt for the occasion. Also because, let's fact it, I've got a lot of baggage. skirt: vintage, etsy; blouse: gift from a friend; belt: Pin Up Girl Clothing; shoes: thrifted Crocs (I know, hard to believe)

What's up in your world, ya'll? Dudes, I've got my feets up and an ice cold...water (sadly) so life here is practically perfect. Today marked the first day for my super student teacher to enter the wild world of art teaching and I couldn't be more excited. Stay tuned for next week's outfit posts that will also feature her groovy looks...just don't tell her about it. She doesn't have a clue that I've been snapping her picture whilst pretending to hold the camera in her direction and mutter, "I wonder what this button does." Silly student teacher.

And speaking of teaching, since seeing me in this get-up, my students have now been learning all about the history behind the kimono. It's quite fascinating so I thought I'd share it with ya'll this week. Until next time, have a fantastic-ish week and I'll talk to you sooner than you'd probably like.

So originally "kimono" was the Japanese word for clothing. Of course now we know it to look a little something like this. This style of kimono came about more than a thousand years ago. Their popularity came into play partly because they are so stinkin easy to stitch up. Known as the straight-line-cut method, it involved simply cutting the fabric in straight lines and stitching them together. This method also meant that the kimono is one-size-fits-all and no tailoring is required.

The Great Wave Tuesday: My students are also learning about ole Hokusai who, apparently, changed his name up to 25 times during his life including a Japanese name that translated to "Old Man Crazy about Drawing". Gotta love an artsy fart with the ability to laugh at his craziness. dress: made by this crazy, DIY here; shoes: Payless

Sadly, it seems that kimono making is a dying art. Hundreds of years ago, thousands of Japanese people were in the kimono making business as it was what was worn daily. Currently only a handful of families craft kimonos with many of those craftsman being elderly. It's sad to think that the art of kimono making is literally a dying one.

First Day O' Kindergarten: This year I have my wee friends for 45 minutes at a time and I'm pretty excited. Once we get past that monkeys-on-crack phase I think we'll be good. Ish. I mean, there is something to be said about teaching a roomful of Crack Monkeys...right? skirt: etsy; top: thrifted; crayon shoes: DIY here; primary colored necklaces: thrifted finds

Traditionally crafted kimonos, from the silk cocoon to the final product involve more than 1000 processes carried out by different craftsmen. Each of these artists learned their crafts from the generations before them...which makes it so sad to think of this art as being lost. At one time, kimonos were worn by every class of people from samurai to aristocrats to the working class. When I was in Japan several years ago, it was rare to see anyone wearing a kimono and the thrift shops were filled with these beautiful robes.

Pencil Me in Thursday: I know, dorkiness abounds. But are you really surprised? pencil skirt: DIY here; top and sweater: Target; shoes: Swedish Hasbeens, Anthropologie sale!

Beautiful, right? Many Japanese are very aware of the change of seasons and love to celebrate it. One way of doing so is to have a kimono that showcases each season. I love this idea and have decided to expand my kimono-wardrobe. Cuz that's just what my overcrowded closet needs.

Friday, Where You Been?!: Kay, not gonna lie, the last two weeks have felt pretty stinkin' long. Which is entirely my fault, too many late nights and early risin's. Would love to say Ima gonna work on that but I just can't make any promises. There's just not enough time in a day, ya'll! skirt: etsy (if you type in "Dorky Art Teacher Clothes", you'd be amazed at what you'd find!); blouse: thrifted; shoes: Payless; palette hair clip: made by me

There are many parts to dressing in traditional Japanese attire beyond the kimono. That giant belt is called an obi which, from the front, you would see has a smaller cord belt wrapped around it called an obi-jime. Those wooden-heeled shoes are called geta and are worn with toe-socks called tabi. And if you look closely, you'll see what looks like another kimono under the ones worn by the ladies above. That's actually a collar called a han'eri. Of course the back of the kimonos is worn low across the neckline to showcase the beauty of the neck.